Tuesday, November 11, 2008

MOANing Leg 4--NYC

Well, we've finally MOANed our way to NYC. While this was actually completed last week, I fell ill with dysentery and had to tend to an oxen with a bad hoof, so the update is a bit late, and I do apologize. I'm just happy I've recovered enough to rejoin the trail!

NYC has been a long awaited pit stop for this journey. Not only for the amazing history, sights, and sounds, but it the home to the incomparable red_wagon and Red2Black as well as the temporary home to her royal highness, the Lady Snark...Firebird!!! MOANers, you can run (which would give you more MOANing miles) but you can't hide from the snarkbite. It's everywhere!

NYC is also not too far from where I grew up on Long Island. I was raised in Syosset, NY, which also home to Natalie Portman, Idina Mentzel, and Judd Apatow. Oh, and my 10th grade English teacher was Balky Bartakamous' roommate at Yale (I will credit anyone who knows who that is with an extra 10 MOANing miles this week). Syosset is also the same town I escaped from every summer to attend sleepaway camp in Pennsylvania. It is in this tradition that I present you with NYC--Mad Libs Edition!

NYC was purchased (number) years ago by (noun) from the (noun). Early settlers in NYC lived in (noun) and worked tirelessly in (noun). These settlers were (adjective) and (adjective). Ellis Island and the (monument) are the beacon of hope for hundreds of thousands of immigrants. But NYC has come along way since then to become the (adjective) and financial capital of the world. It's difficult to become (emotion) in NYC. There's Broadway, Central Park, tons of restaurants and stores, and many, many (adjective) teams. In fact, this year the NY Giants beat the New England Patriots to win the Superbowl! NYC and the surrounding areas are home to many famous people including (person), (person) and (person), bands, and (adjective) landmarks. Hundreds of movies and TV shows have been filmed here such as (movie/TV show), (movie/TV show) and (movie/TV show). While there is a lot to say about NYC, nothing sums it up better than this...NYC is the (adjective) city in the world!

So, that's it for NYC. Put on your kevlar vest because Philly's next!

Thursday, October 30, 2008

MOANing leg 3--New Haven, CT

It didn't take us very long to finish this leg. We seemed to have MOANed in record speed this week, completing a total of 226 miles. In Boston we stocked up on all necessary supplies, including the requisite toothpaste, deodorant, and foot powder. We fed the oxen, bought some more bullets (important as our next stop is NYC followed by Philly), traded for some wagon wheels, and got some well deserved rest. We did some sightseeing, ate some baked beans (we also remembered to stock up on some air freshener), and watched some really good movies. And we picked up some MOANers we lost along the way....Muttleynfelix, Windspring, Cathysmom and we even picked up a new MOANer, KittyCow (she has apparently forgiven us for that whole Revolutionary War thing). I just hope Boston recovers now that we're gone.

Apparently all of the MOANing has gone to my head and I mistakenly said that our next stop was NYC. It is actually New Haven, CT, home to Yale University and the lovely Cathysmom. And lest you think New Haven is only famous for Yale, think again. New Haven has given us such delictable treats as lollipops and "New Haven style" pizza, as well as the Frisbee (invented at Yale), the Erector Set and the first public tree planning program. New Haven has also produced such fine talent as Lauren Ambrose (of Six Feet Under), Walter Camp (the Father of American Football--I'm sure millions of wives around the country are thrilled with him), Eli Whitney, Liz Phair, Michael Bolton ("Why should I change my name? He's the one that sucks"), America's sweetheart Benedict Arnold, and a man of pure genius, Paul Fusco, the creator of the legendary ALF. It's a shame that Yale, with it's Nobel laureates, presidents, and inventors, overshadows the rest of New Haven. I mean, it's not like it's Harvard.

Well ladies, it's been a month and we've made it from Ottawa to New Haven. Not too shabby for a bunch of stinky women with full time jobs and families. Let's see what we can do in November!!!

Monday, October 27, 2008

Random Thoughts by EOG

This week, we take a look into the mind of our very own Elusions of Grandeur. So, without further ado, here is the first installment of Random Thoughts by EOG...

It seems that everyone wants to become something they aren't. And while this constant self bettering is typically a benefit to those who achieve something through their efforts, it can leave those of us who fail in steps one or two a little drained and perhaps less likely to make another attempt in the future. Considering how hard sticking with a new idea can be, especially when it's one little thing after another and then trying to keep track of how far you've come - I suggest that everyone take a chance at just jumping in the water. Forget about testing it with your toe and slowly wading in. Swing off the vine and do a cannonball into the lake. Pretend that you already ARE what you wish to achieve and see how long you can keep that up. Then try again tomorrow and see if you can be that person you want to be even longer and better than the day before. For me, it's being an early riser (which requires a LOT of pretending without coffee - on a side note one of my favorite phrases is "It's too early to be alive."). Who do you want to be?

So, there you have it folks. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

MOANing Leg 2--Boston, MA

Well, we made it to Boston! I didn't think we were going to pull it off, but we managed to do 230 miles this week. And since Port Henry is only 199 miles from Boston, we've got a head start on next week. This is an incredible feat since our group is starting to shrink. I think the bad breath and foot odor finally got the best of some MOANers and they bailed for more pleasant smelling companionship. Hopefully, they didn't get lost in the wilderness (a la Blair Witch Project) and will meet up with us in Boston.

I can't imagine why they wouldn't want to come to Boston, or Beantown (does anyone actually refer to Boston in this manner?). In case you're sitting, scratching your head and asking "why is Boston called Beantown?", here's the explanation: At one time, Boston's port was once filled with ships bringing in sugar and molasses from the West Indies. When some clever Bostonian got the idea of cooking beans and molasses together, a new culinary masterpiece was created - Boston Baked Beans, which quickly became a favorite dish of the locals.

So now that you know the origin of Beantown, here's some more information. Not only is it home to the lovely Honeylioness and native home to Red_Wagon, it's rich with history. Boston has produced some of the greatest moments in American history--the Boston Tea Party, Paul Revere's ride, the Red Sox historic 2004 World Series Win and on, January 15, 1919 a tank burst open in Boston's north end and flooded the streets (a two story high wall of molasses moved 25 mph and killed 21 in a slow, sticky fashion).

In addition to the number of historic moments, Boston and the surrounding areas are also credited with a number of the country's first: telephone demonstration, public park (Boston Common), lighthouse, regularly published newspaper (The Boston News-Letter), subway system, major university (Harvard), and the very first Dunkin Donuts. Oh, and the birth control pill was developed nearby at Clark University. (Thank G-d for these inventions. Without them, we'd be uninformed, cranky, bored, and pregnant. If I didn't love Boston before, I sure do now!)

The volume of artistic talent to come out of Boston and surrounding areas is incredibly high. Some of the most notable: Matt Damon, Dane Cook, Mark Wahlberg, Aerosmith, Denis Leary, Barbara Walters, Ralph Waldo Emerson, Henry David Thoreau, Jack Kerouac, Alexander Graham Bell, and Samuel Adams. Not to mention the Kennedys, Emily Dickinson, and Robert Frost. Tons of movies take place in Boston including: Legally Blonde, Mystic River, Good Will Hunting, the Departed, Fever Pitch and 21. Oh, and it's also home to John Krasinski, the man who brought the wonderful, amazing, Jim Halpert to life.

Let's grab some Boston Creme Pie, some Samuel Adams beer (or some cranberry juice for our nondrinkers), and curl up with a Boston Terrier. This leg isn't too long, but our next destination will be exhausting. We neeed to MOAN really hard in order to get to...New York City!!!

Monday, October 20, 2008

Hi, I'm in Delaware

Currently, I call Delaware home. And it has recently occurred to me that most people know absolutely nothing about Delaware, except that it's the butt of many jokes and Joe Biden is one of our Senators. Admittedly, Delaware doesn't have much. It's even hard to find the place on a map (hint--it's next to Maryland). But there's more to Delaware than being the first state to ratify the Constitution (this is how we came up with our clever nickname "The First State"--the creative juices just flow in Delaware). And since it's more than likely our next Vice President will be from Delaware, I've decided it's time to highlight some of the noteworthy features of this "Small Wonder" (another one of our clever little tag lines). I promise to make this brief (actually, I have no choice. Remember, Delaware doesn't have much).

Delaware--a small state sandwiched between Maryland, Pennsylvania, and New Jersey. Comprised of 3 counties. Only one area code for the whole state. Not a large enough population to put letters on license plates. Can drive the entire state on one tank of gas. Primary employers are the banking/credit card industry (yup, many of your monthly payments are processed right here in Delaware), agriculture with an emphasis on chickens, and State government. No professional sports teams though the Wilmington Blue Rocks play here (they are the Class A affiliate of the Kansas City Royals. One of two mascots is Mr. Celery. He is scary). Best known for tax free shopping, many, many tax incentives for businesses (The Backstreet Boys are even incorportated here--how lucky are we?), the University of Delaware, some giagantic NASCAR race that virtually doubles the state's population for a weekend, our beaches and shopping outlets. Has been featured on "Surf and Rescue" (Dewey Beach), "Ghost Hunters" (Fort Delaware), and some show on the Food Network and/or Travel Channel involving good places to pig out (Cluck U). Current contestant on "The Amazing Race" is from Delaware.

Famous People
George Thoroghgood--known for such prophetic songs as "Bad to the Bone" and "I Drink Alone". Any chance one has to do with the other?
Teri Polo--best known as Ben Stiller's girlfriend in "Meet the Parents" and "Meet the Fockers". Should have just stuck with "Meet the Parents".
Rich Gannon--not origianlly from Delaware, but was the quarterback for the University of Delaware (Go Hens!!!) and played in the Superbowl with the Oakland Raiders (vs. Tampa Bay--Oakland lost 48-21).
Ryan Phillipe--seriously, he's from Delaware. Actor in movies such as "Stop, Loss", "Crash", and "Cruel Intentions".
Joe Flacco--current quarterback for the Baltimore Ravens. Don't know much about him and usually can't remember his name. Also, not a Delaware native but did play for the Hens.
Bill Roth--deceased Delaware Senator and creator of the Roth IRA.
The DuPont Family--made their fortune in gunpowder. Essentially own most of the state.
Valerie Bertinelli--star of "One Day at a Time". Former wife of Eddie Van Halen and current Jenny Craig spokesperson.

So, that's pretty much all you need to know about Delaware. It's small, it's flat, it has no sales tax. So, now when Delaware comes up in conversation at a party, you can contribute more than "Hi, I'm in Delaware." And this will make you very popular.